Couldn't have said it better myself

Does this at least count as "off-Broadway"?

The job description: Imagine 4 performers, under the direction of a dance captain/tour manager, embodying the essence of CHICAGO through movement and acting while interacting with the public. Part-time positions. People who love CHICAGO and FOSSE highly desirable.

The reality: Imagine 4 performers, working individually, freezing their asses off in hotpants and character shoes, cheering and handing out Chicago flyers to tourists in Times Square. People who have given up on their actual performing careers, and don't mind ruining their vocal chords and leg muscles working 6 hour shifts in subzero temps, are highly desirable.

Another sucky job!

On a break from promoting poultry in Bryant Park. And as if the job in itself wasn't bad enough, 5 minutes after I took this photo, the rain started to pour. Not a good day for this Chicken.

If this is not a real shit job, I don't know what is

Dressing up as a toilet in Times Square? Yelling catchy slogans on a megaphone or waving a pair of toilet paper pom-poms does actually not seem so bad in comparison.

How to not lose your bird

43rd & 9th: This breaks my heart.






















I guess this is more like how it's done:

Motorcycle Vandal on 12th Street

This was just posted all over our block....





















I think I might know who this vandal is, and I can also confirm he's a long-time serial offender.
















Ooops. Puppy better watch out....

Hard work on "Damages"!

Playing an office drone requires just as much effort as actually being one.

Another one bites the dust

And you actually used to think it couldn't get any worse back when they stopped selling vinyl.

Fall foliage and daydreaming in Central Park

Just like most other New Yorkers, I always claim I could never, ever live anywhere else - the horror! - and then I will undoubtedly proceed by complaining about everything I hate about the city. The lack of fall and spring season is definitely up there. Windchill in the teens or heatstroke warning with temps in the high 90s and the humidity from hell - take your pick. You want something in-between, you've come to the wrong place!

Fortunately, there are occasional exceptions. I live for those rare, crisp, sunny-but-not-too-sunny autumn days when you can lie for hours on your back in Central Park, daydreaming and squinting at the foliage.

This is what I mean.

A non-NY snippet

Being someone who rarely ventures outside of Manhattan and has very limited experience of the U.S. outside of New York, with the exception of some major cities such as Boston, Seattle, Philly etc, I am constantly reminded by my boyfriend that I have not seen "the real America". Even after my road trip last week, I'm still not sure I can claim otherwise... but if not anything else, I did indeed have "the real Greyhound experience" - for better or for worse.

My itinerary: New York to Raleigh, NC, via Washington, DC, and Richmond, VA.... and back within the next 12 hours. See below for some random observations I made during this journey.

First disturbing observation: the Greyhound station in Richmond (below) offers soda, candy, chips and cheetos.... but no coffee. At 9:30 in the morning. People don't drink coffee in the real America?

Also below: my fellow bus travelers lining up to snag all the window seats. Why do people insist on getting a window seat, unless they're actually able to sit still for the upcoming three hours? Getting up and down, up and down, running to the bathroom, poking around in your luggage on the shelf above the seats, making the person next to you stand up, move their legs to the side, and interrupt their sleep about 10 million times is not cool. If you're an ADD sufferer, deal with it and pick an aisle seat!





















Speaking of seats...

I must be dumb. I thought the seats with extra legroom were for... us people with long legs? Apparently they're for ghetto moms bringing 10 tons of shit on the bus and feeding their babies Cheetos and supersize Orange Fanta, simultanelously screaming on their cell phones for 4 hours straight. My bad!





















You didn't think your bus will leave at 11:30pm just because it says so on the (prepaid) ticket, right?

Waiting in Raleigh.
















And waiting.
















And waiting... 2 hours later.
















Pillows are good! Skip the Cheetos and instead bring your own pillow to snuggle with! Also, it proved to be great for blocking out the stench from the KFC fried chicken with accoutrements that the majority of my fellow passengers picked up for breakfast (I kid you not) in Baltimore.
















Let's just say the black coffee and fresh cinnamon raisin bagel I got for breakfast from a street vendor, immediately after getting off the bus at Port Authority Friday morning, never tasted so well before... nothing makes you appreciate New York as being away from New York. Even if it's just for 24 hours!

Workplace safety

So, if you find my explosives and send me home.... will I still get paid the $139 8h minimum?